Seriously, there seems to be a huge absorbtion war going on between paper towel companies these days and I'm not really sure why. I don't need to suck up a fucking pool of liquids with one piece, and I don't need it to be tough enough for me to carry a baby across the city without ripping afterwards. Fancy designs won't help me pick up dog shit any easier. Who's sitting around testing and creating these things? Fucking scientists? Is paper towel diversity that crucial to us all?